On Having Children

It is so natural that friends start asking when we are going to have our own kids after we got married. And normally, I do not know how to answer. In fact, I am torn when it comes to having our own children. There are times when I'm broody. That would come when I see a cute baby in a stroller, a family of four taking dinner together, or a little boy playing soccer with his dad. That was the time my maternal instinct came so strong that I would feel a surge of longing for our own kid.

But there are a lot more times where I dont want children. When they are screaming, yelling, crying and fretting for goodness-knows-what. I got annoyed very easily by that. See, for me, I dont know what to do with kids. I dont have a single idea how to make them occupied or make them laugh. I would just look at them and go " Err.. what do you want me to do?" My husband's great with kids. He knows how to play with them and make them laugh. He knows how to communicate with them even though he doesnt have any clue of the baby talk. He is good in using different approaches to discipline the kids.

Having said that, I am not totally resist from having children. Knowing that there are a lot of couples hunger for their own kids but unable to have. In the contrary, there are much people who play a fool and ended up with the 'unwanted' kids. I would be grateful to have our own kids. But as for now, due to much uncertainties that we are facing, I guess it's not the right timing yet. However, we would happily accept whatever that comes knowing that there is nothing which is out of control.

我的信主見證

出生在一个虔诚佛教的家庭使我没机会认识那全能的真神。我的祖父是一家寺庙的创办人，而我父亲也积极的参于寺庙里的大小事务。因此顺理成章的，自小我就盲目的去敬拜这些偶像。在就读小学时，我什至报读了本地的一所佛教学校。这些背景使到我无形中认识到许多关于佛教的事情，但同时也阻止了我有机会去认识那独一的真神。与此同时，在这些年来，我察觉到在我周围的人都惧怕死亡。这种现像也促使我开始思考有关生命的课题。我死后将往哪里去？我为什么活在这世界上？我活着的人生目标是什么？我活着是否就为了要成为一个“好人”,以至死后可以投胎转世再成为人？若是如此，不断地轮回转世又为了什么？我在我父母的宗教里无法找到真正的答案。

是上帝的恩典让我在中学时期有机会认识他。当我十五岁那年，我父母开始参加某教会的主日崇拜。那是我人生第一次参加教会聚会。话虽如此，教会对我来说也只不过是一个让我学习唱歌和与同龄朋友交流的地方。那时候，我根本不觉得上帝与我是有关系的。一些年日后，我父母也不再参加教会聚会，而我也因此停止了。无论如何，关于生命的问题还是不间断的缠绕着我的心思。每当听到有人逝世时，我总是感到无奈与惧怕。

经过大约两年的思索，感谢神，因他终于回答了我的问题。我认识了一位基督徒的朋友，他邀请我参加了学院里的基督教团契。我参加基督教团契的目的，是希望得到纠缠了我许久那问题的答案。我在每周的查经班里开始一点一滴的认识了耶稣，认识了生命的意义。直到我参加了该基督教团契所主办那命名为“突破”（Breakthrough）的营会时，我真正的突破对死亡的恐惧，清楚知道死后的去处。我开始理解人活着的意义，也明白人需要透过耶稣基督重新建立与神和谐的关系。这一切皆从我承认我是一个罪人和我需要耶稣基督的赎罪与救赎而开始。正如约翰福音14章6节所说的，耶稣说：“我就是道路、真理、生命；若不借着我，没有人能到父那里去。”

这就是我如何在神的恩典与怜悯被重生的经历。从那刻起，我的生命就开始不断的更新，按照圣经的教导，学习更像耶稣基督的样式。

Loss and Gain

What am I going to do for the next few years? That's the question that has been keeping my brain working for the past few months. In fact, I have been cracking my head for a while and finally came out with a few good ideas. Immediately I started to analyse the pros and cons of those ideas that I have came out with and even started writing down in a proper plan with the so-called SWOT analysis in management term.

However, as soon as I pressed the 'go' button, things came unexpectedly. Someone called me up for a different offer... That's when I pull myself back a bit to think if my idea is workable. And immediately the next morning, an email flown to my husband's inbox urging me to take up another option which would benefit our future ministry tremendously. Things did not stop it here. At that particular night, an email article came straight hitting me to the face on my ignorance to the calling. In reality, I am so kia-su that I dont dare to take up the challenge. However, that article has shown me the path that I should take in leading me to where I should be in the future. Minutes after reading the article, another email came in the inbox asking me to seriously consider of taking up the challenge.

I seriously know that taking up the challenge would be the best option. In fact, that's what I hope to do as well. But there are still many things that's worrying me despite it being the best option among all. After much discussion with hubz, we finally mutually agreed on taking up the challenge and supporting each other along the way...

And the decision is only the beginning of this path. we foreseen gazillion of problems and decisions are waiting for us along the way.

Jesus Christ Is Risen Today!

Jesus Christ is risen today, Alleluia!

Our triumphant holy day, Alleluia!

Who did once, upon the cross, Alleluia!

Suffer to redeem our loss, Alleluia!

Hymns of praise then let us sing, Alleluia!

Unto Christ, our heavenly King, Alleluia!

Who endured the cross and grave, Alleluia!

Sinners to redeem and save, Alleluia!

But the pains which He endured, Alleluia!

Our salvation hath procured, Alleluia!

Now above the sky He’s king, Alleluia!

Where the angels ever sing, Alleluia!

Sing we to our God above, Alleluia!

Praise eternal as His love, Alleluia!

Praise Him, all you heavenly host, Alleluia!

Father, Son, and Holy Ghost, Alleluia!

Translating...

Due to some reasons I would need to translate my english version of resume into mandarin version. Mind you, not only to simplified chinese but to traditional chinese. What a painful experience I had! It took me 2 days just to complete the translation with the help of google translate. However, through this task I manage to learn more proper chinese sentences which is kind of different from the way we speak to each other.

Really hope that my effort will not be in vain but would produce some results in the days to come...